Day 2

Depending on what time of the day you asked me changed how I felt about the day.  Starting out it was very cold and I got a late start unwilling to leave my warm bed when it was so dark and thunder was rumbling.  I will say that waking up to the sound of coffee brewing is nice.  Jason took me up to the school so that I could eat before heading out.  Rhi and Joan had left really early and we passed the rest of our group on our way to the school.  I did get to catch up with a friend of mine from college who is also doing BAK.

On the road, it was calm, cloudy and dark. The first part of the route was the longest at 18 miles.  During this part I was already thinking about what I was going to write tonight.  About how calm you can feel pedaling and passing other cyclists.  I wish I could capture this feeling and keep it for when I need it.

I made it to the midway point by 10:30.  Had some delicious peach cobbler, called the husband. I felt at this time I was doing well.  I was having some tenderness in the tailbone area but thought I could deal. So I refilled my water and headed towards the next stop.  It should have been easy, 13 miles or so. But honestly it was rough and my back end was really starting to scream.  Now I was basically riding on my own and my  brain isn't always nice to me so the doubts set in.  The next stop finally got there.  I stop, have a snack, refill my water and go.  Only 15 miles left.  I was wiggling in my seat now.  And the road wasn't straight, you'd see the town and then the road went the wrong way.  Seemed like the longest 15 miles.  I got to the last town at around 1:30.  I was so happy to get off the bike.  Called Jason to pick me up. A shower should help, right. And it did, to a point.  I am nervous, anxious and scared.  63 miles should not have been that difficult for me.  The what ifs won't leave me alone.

I did get a nice distraction going with Jason to Liberal to the air museum.  He was so excited to see his favorite planes and they were cool.  There are pictures below.  Then we stuffed ourselves at Applebee's and headed back.  At this point it was a good day again.

I had to go to the general meeting at 8.  While waiting I heard from Joan and Rhi (both BAK veterans) that today was rough for them too.  Then the meeting started.  Apparently we were the only ones who had a rough day, everyone else was positive.  Then they talked about the miles and the weather situation. Hello anxiety.

At this point a normal person should stop and not tell you about the next 15 minutes while Jason drove us back to the camper.  But I want to be honest here and say I had a mini meltdown.  I'm scared.  What if I'm in pain all day tomorrow or the rest of the week. What if I can't do this, quit, or fail.  I tell you about this not for sympathy, no one forced me to take on this challenge. I tell you for two reasons, one so that if I make it and inspire someone else I want you to know that it's okay to be scared.  Two, is to tell you that having a strong supporter or supporters help.  Jason is my hero, and I am blessed to have found such a person as him.  He told me he knows that I can do it because I'm me.  I ask him why is he so confident when I'm me and I'm not confident at all. And then he asks, when I have you ever decided to do something and not completed it.  I didn't have an answer.

And so while I am still sore and anxious, I feel that Jason has a point. 

I leave you with pictures of the air museum and with hope that tomorrow it won't look so scary.